What is “normal”?
Your sexuality is a very personal experience. Our society places a lot of expectations on who we should be. Not many people can completely conform to these rules. Thankfully attitudes have changed, and these days it’s normal to see same sex couples in the mainstream media as well as in real life. That said, many of us still struggle to come to terms with sexual desires outside the parameters expected by society, our families and partners. Guilt around sexuality and gender Is very common.
Straight-Heterosexual-Normal?
In Western culture, sexual attraction to the opposite sex is regarded as normal. Straight sex would appear to be how the majority of people experience their sex lives. It is how we usually start the process of procreation after all. Consequently the person who does not conform to this “Straight Normality” can feel shame and guilt around their desires.
Other Sexual and Gender expressions
There is a huge variation in how humans express their sexuality and gender. Depending who you believe, there are between one and forty seven different sexualities
Do you think thats a lot? That doesnt even touch on Gender discriptions. Regarded as being somewhere between two and Seventy two. In other words, gender expression is vast.
In our experience, sexuality and gender are hardly ever just straight or gay, male or female. Once we dig under the surface, even the most macho of guys, has an interest or hobby that society regards as feminine.
How Can Counselling help?
Counsellors usually go through a very long process of discovering themselves. It is what good training courses concentrate on. As a result, having learned to accept ourselves, we find it easier to accept what others find shameful about themselves. We will understand your guilt around sexuality and gender. In short, we will listen to your story, we will accept and cherish you. To us, it doesn’t matter where your sexuality or gender identity lies.
